Sunday 5th July, 10h53: (said in a David Attenborough-like voice) A large creature in red is making a dash into the opposition circle in the lush surrounds of the Morningside Country Club. Built like the White Rhinoceros, he is deceptively quick and pounces on any feeding opportunity that presents itself...

10h54: The large rhino spots a chance and makes a fantastic diagonal run, swooping past Game Ranger Fourie, whistle in hand... The Ranger thinks to himself: “something’s on here... and it aint a lady with a lovely b0som!” Elephant Denysshcen spots rhino from the corner of his eye... (Elephant notes what an athlete the Rhino really is) and unleashes a cracking pass into the circle. Rhino does a little shimmy and turns on a six pence like a London Cab, evading his marker he extends his stick and deflects the ball into the back of the net....

Attenborough is beside himself with joy as all National Geographic fans worldwide celebrate in front of their television screens...

For those that are wondering what the f#$% I’m on about, you missed probably the best goal ever scored by an MFP!! J or so you would have thought with the noise that the Rhino made in his goal celebration...

There were a number of hangovers that arrived at MCC on Sunday following a general boozy weekend... some arrived on time, others went to the wrong venue and Dewald arrived mid-way through the first half!!

Nonetheless a short corner after 10 minutes saw Stokkies rocket home from the top of the D and for the first time this season, the MFP’s were in front... it stayed that way until “Rhino” (playing in defence) gifted the ball to the opposition and the breakaway goal brought things level. Fritzy (looking green in the gills) never had any chance with their second a few minutes later for us to go into the break 2-1 down.

The MFP’s played some awesome hockey in the second half and really spread the ball around... somehow the oppo managed to sneak in third goal which Fritzy casually left alone, thinking it had come off the strikers foot! (hahaha J) he was very embarrassed and proceed to take the Punchy Heyns / Carvs award for his antics 2 minutes later when the self-same striker ran into the D, only to be told in no uncertain terms that he would be “squashed like a worm!” The adjectives were slightly different...

It was at this stage that The Athletic Rhino pushed forward through the herd and found himself up-front to make it 3-2, and all of a sudden we thought we were in with a chance but alas they snuck a 4th towards the end to leave the final score 4-2...

All in all, the MFP’s played some awesome hockey and their was much banter and laughter on Sunday making for a super morning...

The fines meeting was a cracker, with Rhino talking himself up for much of it... By the sounds of a phone call that I got from Stoks at about 5pm, it carried on for some time afterwards as well. It seemed as though Stoks and Gazza were arguing over the movement that had lead to Rhino’s goal and needed some clarification.

Awards: MOM: Rhino
FUBAR: ?? (Crumbs Scribe is losing it...)
Punchy Heyns/Carvs: Fritzy
Nathaniel: Kev (I think, for taking on some chaps with weapons after Nico’s thrash on Friday!)

Lads, there is NO GAME this Sunday... so put the feet up, ice the legs and get ready for a return to action next Sunday.

MFP 2009

Well, well, well....

This time over a year ago, I wrote "well blow me down and call me Fat Carvs!!" Either I was blown extremely hard (or well) or Fat Carvs simply never made another appearance on the site...

Perhaps a touch of both, but now that I've re-discovered the login details, its all systems go for MFP blogging in 2009.

A quick re-cap on the season to date is that we have somehow found ourselves playing in what we'd term the Super League of Social Hockey. Opposition have set short-corner moves and seem to drink very little beer after the games! Boooo to the oppo, big up to the Motch Fuddles who despite not scoring on the field, seem to be doing fairly well off the park.

Nico is raising his bat for the half century in the next few weeks and still seems to be the casanova that he was in his teens - 35 years of drinking double canes and coke and we are not sure if the same applies to his stamina!

So, after this early teaser, here's to much scribing on the site - I'm still trying to work out how to add pictures to the text so that should come in the next few weeks...

Up the Puckers.

Scribe

The Scribe Returns...

Well blow be down and call me Fat Carvs! We're back online. (This is my first contribution so not quite sure how this thing works...call it testing the waters - much like "Nike-O" did with the Doctor on Sat evening)

The start of the new season and with it, the beginning of a new blogging era in the MFP's... Got a fairly sore head this morning after testing the various white rums on offer in the Chariots Bar yesterday until 5pm yesterday (thanks Steve) - almost had a second chicken prego for dinner!

Much excitement as the Aussie Tour approaches and this was very evident at the Official Kit Hand-out on sat at Gazza's spot...

A full report of this and the seasons two fixtures will follow later today... (along with a few pics).

It's great to be back.

Be cool but dont freeze...
Scribe

Lets go BOS. Rhymes with ...

Another busy couple of weeks for the MFP, and the half season looms coming up to three weeks of no hockey. Time to mend a few broken fingers. Get back into the shape we were all in pre-season. Take stock of how we managed to end the half year exactly where we are supposed to be - Middle of the table.

Last week Friday night saw the MFP playing the cultural boys from CBC Boksburg. A hell of a fast paced game. The MFP had a great opening half, no doubt helped by an unbiase captain umpiring the first half. 2-0 at half time with Dave Hasel and Al Wikham (no that's not a typo) the scorers. The banter as usual was out of the top draw. Heard on the field "You are to short to pick a fight" to "You are to fat to play hockey". One of the CBC Boksburg crowd was accused of being from Benoni. These guys are seriously proud of their heritage and took great exception, go figure. The game continued at this furious pace and with legs feeling a little wobbly the MFP went down 2-0 in the second half. So a 2-2 draw against a spirited CBC Boksburg side. We must have given them a hell of a fright as they have given us a walkover in the next game. Fines was held at the Dros. Frank once again in fine form. The bar bill coming to an astounding R1200 (with absolutely no food). MOM Dave Thomas for pitching up pissed and being as solid as ever. Grazie got the Fubar award. Phil, I think, got the red helmet. If you not sure what the red helmet is for it rhymes with hunt. Couple of the chaps had a late night but for the most part a fairly sedate fines.

On to Sunday at which I didn't play, here are some pictures and FC Franks account of the match.

Got down at about 8h15 to be greeted by an extended squad of 16 fine young gentlemen all looking keen to take on our fellow Wanderer's club members. Give a constructive team chat about playing in the right spirit, explaining previous history of some bad blood etc. Great start to the game going up 1-0 early in the first half to a well worked goal by Dave Hazell. Snake man takes one on the finger for the team, looks nasty but avoids Dr Muzza on sound advice from Grazie. Concede a long corner goal and then a second. Game then takes on that nasty edge (again due to distinct lack of sense of humor from immature opposition) resulting in Nico replacing their umpire. Muzza single handedly squanders at least 8 second half chances, maybe he doesn't understand the word "pass", while chirping Phil (our second half ump) then fucks off early, resulting in him receiving the FUBAR award even though he isn't at fines. A great second half effort from the entire side, lots of guts and determination on display. Give an emotional speech after the game which brings a tear to my own eyes. Fines chair concedes that trivia questions during the previous two meetings have become a bit obscure (only one correct answer out of 30) and will make a concerted effort to try and make questions more constructive. The bong however makes a welcome return and will most certainly become more of a permanent fixture. The rest of fines proceeds at a spirited pace with good humor all round. Opposition nowhere in sight. Mike Fritzie gets the red helmet for the huge snarley he brings to the half time talk.Skeggo receives the man of the match award for a spirited effort which he easily eclipses off the field by keeping Andrew, Nico, Billy, Myself and the beautiful Kath, drinking until well into the evening. No time given cause things are a bit blurry by then. Nico, Billy and myself then follow up by going to Mi-Varmi's for a schwarma where Nico promptly falls asleep and Billy decides to contest our bill with a spirited argument. All in all, another successful MFP day. Monday is a nightmare!

Thanks Frank.

*On a side note... there are some seriously weird pictures taken by Nico of a few bald patches (3 to be exact) that I am entirely to scared to post. If anyone can explain Nico's rational of taking pictures of blokes bald spots.... please let me know. WTF???

To this weekends game then, admittedly my mind was not completely focused on hockey so on match day we had 14 down including 2 keepers and a notable first, Gary's son, Justin played his first game for the MFP, I think his first official game of hockey ever. Well done Justin! Nico having a bit of a dodgy knee, rumor has it from dancing, he should know better, I mean really, volunteered to umpire and thank goodness there was at least on decent umpire on the pitch. Grant, along with Steve Moore, who was sounding a bit worse for wear, nonetheless had the midfield sewn up tighter than a ducks arse in water. At times there was some fantastic hockey and at times there was some absolute rubbish. 1-1 at half time with a great shorty strike from Phil, whose calf seemed to remember that is was pulled a couple of weeks ago and started acting up again. Dave T was also struggling with a back strain. Andrew Johnson was late once again, taking over the mantle from Dave T rather well, and rather mysteriously as I don't think he has the wife and children excuse yet. A bit of shocking umpiring saw the opponents awarded a P-Flick, which they duly converted even though Shayne managed to get a stick to the ball. End result 2-1 down. Fines went as follows Man of the Match Grant, fubar to Grazza for having a full blown freshy in the D. Certainly blew the hair back of the dudes running first wave.

On a personal note, thanks to everyone who wished my Father well over his triple bypass, things didn't look so good on the weekend, but he seems to be on the mend now. Have a good break everybody!